What would I tell my young self if I had the chance?

I am often approached or contacted by parents who have a child with Cerebral Palsy. Parents always do the best for their child, no matter what. They make sure that what they are doing gives their child the best chance or opportunities. Many of them ask me what I wish somebody had told me as a child growing up with a disability?

It is a hard question to answer.  There are many things I wish I had known.  I wish I had someone to talk to in a similar position to me, trying to find their way in the world with a disability. I was lucky that I had parents who treated me the same as my sister. I did everything my sister did, and experienced life to the full. I had some amazing experiences that have certainly had a positive impact on who I am today. Who would let their 15-year-old disabled daughter travel to Vancouver for 3 ½ weeks with a local youth group? The answer is my parents!

Going through school and in the early part of adult life, there were times I was protected. Maybe I missed out on things I wanted to do, or at least try. If I could rewind to my school years, I would certainly push myself to be heard more and make sure my opinions and thoughts were heard (I have certainly made up for this now!).

Many people thought they knew what was best for me, but not necessarily asked me what I wanted to do. I ended up doing some GCSEs that I didn’t want to do (and I was rubbish at).  I knew that they were not my speciality and for this reason, I didn’t try as hard as I could have done.

I would always encourage every disabled person to make sure they are heard.  More importantly, take any opportunity to try everything. If you don’t succeed straight away, don’t worry, as when you do, it is a very proud moment.   Experience new things and embrace what opportunities they have. Don’t see a disability as a barrier or a stumbling block, see it as an opportunity, a chance to show others what can be achieved no matter what life throws at you. If somebody says, “you can’t” then find a way to say and show “I can”.

I tell any parent that life is an uphill battle. It may seem like a long road. You may feel as if you were always taking three steps back to move one step forward, but they and their child will accomplish something amazing and unique. It could be something very small, or something on a much larger scale.  No matter what it is, you always have to remember that they have achieved and have succeeded.

During my time taking part in athletics, I always had a saying, “Success is not the position you stand, but the direction in which you look”. This has driven me throughout my life.  I have so many dreams, I have so many aspirations, and I always look forward and not back. I cannot change the past, but I can certainly influence mine and other disabled people’s future.

To conclude and to answer the original question, I would say success comes in many sizes and many forms. No matter what struggles you have gone through, or are going through, you will achieve. You must be proud of yourself. Don’t shy away from any opportunity.  Everything is a learning curve and you might learn in a different way from others.